FIREBASE STEPHANIE
Richard Albertson December 30, 2000
Re: Beginning of May 1968, Vietnam, somewhere outside Saigon near the Cholon District.
Following up with Norm's excellent account of the beginning of May, I would like to add some of my own memories and accounts of experiences back then in A/4/12, 199th Light Infantry, alongside my fellow Redcatcher buddies and friends. Actually, this is also a continuation of my posting of September 21, 2000. I must apologize for my long absence in this part of the conversation. I really have no excuse, except I began to be overwhelmed by many personal matters, as well as I wanted to take time and read and reflect over some of the inputs that were now beginning to come into the conversation. Such as, for example, Steve Gensers' personal account, Sam Plotts', and Jerry Burger, among other commentaries. I want to thank all of you for it has helped to listen to your stories because some of the pieces of my own began to make more sense. It was a kind of wonderful validation that I wasn't mad after all! Of course, while I want to respond in some form to these entries, like all of you, I would like to try to draw as much as possible from my own experiences and perspective.
Ultimately, this account will run through to May 30th and the few days thereafter. However, from my own perspective, I believe covering the first part of May will help me connect to the later part. In fact, this entire month, in many ways, seems so interconnected that sometimes I have a hard time distinguishing one day from another. That is, it often appears to me as if in a dream, memories, and images moving in and out of each other, shifting back and forth, which appears compounded into a complex set of mazes and mixtures of events. This may be partly due to the fact that much of it has come back to me in the still of the night, asleep, only to awaken me as if I am still there, grasping onto something, trying to hold on or let go. To use an analogy similar to Norms, it is as if this strange video inside my mind continually replays the same events over and over again, somehow asking me to finish the scene or play, the battlefield stage upon which we spilt our blood, tears, and fears. And perhaps, made many silent prayers.
I vividly remember being airlifted and then hovering over the dense jungles in eagle flight formation until we reached this clearing, looking down at the rice paddies below, dropping us off onto this wide dirt road. For some strange reason, I have always held the impression that the dirt road, alongside of which we set up our perimeter that became Firebase Stephanie, had something to do with the famous Ho Chi Minh trail. I don't remember what and that is probably because it was not? In some respects, the rice paddies, with the dikes that looked like tic-tac-toe puzzles from the sky, felt somehow more comforting than the dark dense jungles. At the same time, however, one suddenly felt this kind of nakedness, being readily open to fire on all sides.
After we had all gathered within our units, squads, and platoons, it seems like the first thing we did is hump into that village towards Cholon. I can't remember for sure whether it was at this time, as we approached this little village, that we ran into this Vietnamese hanging by his neck from a tree? I vaguely remember that this was where it seems like the road ran into a Y: one leg to the left entered the village, while the other may have been the road to where we headed towards that area where we made the May 30th contact? It would be helpful if someone else can remember. For me, to say the least, whichever it was it hung there as if in effigy of events to come, stirring and haunting the inner recesses of my soul.
The image of this hanging body, the stark reality of a human being hanging from his neck, has remained with me ever since. What did it mean? Perhaps it could have been one of those Popular Forces who guarded their villages, who wouldn't succumb to the VC terrorist tactics of recruitment? For me one thing was clear, this burning image symbolized the psychological aspect of terrorism of the VN war, reflecting a universal message of the ugly macabre of war and the dehumanization of men as human beings. This is not easy to remember.
It could have been that this hanging incident occurred later since the VC in the village had not yet been discovered or uncovered. Yes, Norm, your description of how strange it felt going through that village with the abnormally unfriendly villagers rings very true for me. It seems to me that it was near this village where the ROK camp was located. I remember stories being passed around about how much the VC hated and greatly feared these Korean combat units. It was definitely a relief to get through this village, humping our way out to where we set up Firebase Stephanie. From this view it seems like our perimeter was on the left (West?) side of the dirt road while looking directly back at the Northern direction of the village, Cholon, and Saigon beyond? I recall this heavy tree line running Westerly (?) from the outside tip of the village dirt road, all the way to where the NVA would later make contact with the ROK camp.
It seems to me that this was the direction and stage upon which we would soon witness the most amazing theatre of battlefield fireworks on a scale we had never seen before. Wet and cold from the monsoons, we tried to set up our spot on the dikes as best we could. I believe we were told not to blow up our air mattresses as they were too noisy, making squeaky noises from the wet conditions. It seems like to me that it was just before dusk of the second (or third) evening at Firebase Stephanie when all hell broke loose. As Norm points out, we were listening to the radio transmissions when all of a sudden chaos was overwhelming Company (D?), which had set up their perimeter the farthest North of our position. I remember we were all glued to the radio trying to find out what was going on, listening intently.
It is hard to remember exactly, as is no doubt the case whenever chaos lurks its head, but it seems like the word was out that Company D was being over-run by the NVA Regiment (or was it a Division?). We could actually hear the guns and explosions over the radio, as well as in the not too far distance of what had been a pretty silent night. I remember I had this sinking feeling in my stomach, wondering whether it was soon going to be our turn.
Apparently, as Norm also points out, the NVA was not really trying to over-run the Company, but merely trying to move around it, onward to the target mission…Saigon? Perhaps this is why the NVA were diverted and wound up advancing through the tall grassy fields just Westerly of our position. I will not and cannot forget the amazing spectacle of watching those heads off in the distance, looking as if they were bobbing up and down, hundreds or thousands of heads passing by, continuously advancing towards the grove of trees, the ROK camp, and Saigon beyond. The incredible sight left indelible images for me, a moving picture that would continue to be replayed in my inner mind and nightmares thereafter. It seemed like we all sat there in a kind of trance, as if in a theatre watching this horrendous battle begin to unfold, starring perhaps in disbelief, wondering whether they would move towards us? As Norm points out again, this is maybe why the incident of Reinhardt and Jim Cole erupted. I wasn't right there, but I do remember some kind of commotion within our ranks. We needed to become more like a giant LP, trying to silently avoid any engagement. There was little question that we were in an extraordinary precarious and vulnerable position. Who knows, maybe they would have avoided us at all costs anyway?
All I remember is that I was trying to pull myself up against the dike as close as I could get. Suddenly I didn't care about the mud, the cold, and the wet. I could feel the fear grab my insides, expressing itself in the tightness of every muscle in my body; suddenly I felt this tremendous surge of adrenaline rush to my brain and pumping back out through the extremities of my body through to my fingertips. Throughout my combat experience I always tried to remember the three key pointers my Uncle Don, a battlefield commissioned officer in WWII, drilled into me before I went. 1) Always try to be aware of a place to land; 2) acknowledge the fear but try to turn it into positive energy, an ally rather than enemy, so that you don't lose your head; and 3) look out for your buddy and he will do the same for you. I said it to myself like a silent mantra every time something broke out. I dove for the dike in fear and looked around to all of my buddies who seemed to be doing the same thing.
I could hear choppers overhead in the air and suddenly this burst of light lit up the night; the landscape upon which this battlefield was about to erupt. It flashed profusely in front of my eyes. I could see the horizon off into the distance, hovering over us like giant, multicolored, billowing clouds, flashing in the night with different hues of light. And the bobbing heads charged, still advancing ahead. That is when I first began to see those red streaks of rain, as if in a huge shower, scattering and penetrating the very landscape upon which the bobbing heads were advancing. "Spooky" was an incredible sight to witness in action; or as some call, "Puff the Magic Dragon," for it did seem like magic as the fire rained down like a giant dragon releasing its terror out of its nostrils onto the battlefield where our eyes remained glued. It was said that the NVA feared Spooky or the Dragon the most, and it was not difficult to understand why. If one listened intently, you could hear the otherwise muted engines purring lightly high into the sky.
Only problem was, it suddenly became clear to me, Spooky was not very discriminating, because some of those red tracers began to penetrate into our own perimeter as well. I remember saying, "holy shit, there going to get us," as I saw the red tracers penetrating the ground right next to me, and actually heard a thud hitting the ground. This was not a good feeling to say the least. I recall all of us getting a bit excited about it; but then it seems like there were more bursts of light in the air, and Spooky must have altered its direction, as the red streaks seemed to be aimed more at the NVA. With everything going on simultaneously, it is difficult to remember what was happening next, but I think it was about this time that the NVA was said to have made contact with the ROK camp. In fact, some claimed that they ran smack dab into the camp. And this is when all hell broke loose!
As Norm describes it, it was like the 4th of July. Huge explosions and lightning bursts flashed in the night, giving us a front row seat, as if in this giant outdoor theatre, the horrific stage upon which this battlefield became ablaze with fire. Simply add to all of this, Norm's description from his perspective, and it is not difficult for anyone to imagine the horror; but what about those of us who were in the midst of it? And it continued all through the night. It was a sight I would never forget, as I can even now see it flashing across the inner landscape of my own mind, stirring my heart and soul. I believe that it was around this time that someone started talking about an NVA who stumbled right into our perimeter, and immediately gave himself up and became one of our prisoners. I remember seeing him the next morning, and as Norm says, he was just a little kid. War is both strangely bazaar if not almost comically tragic at the same time.
I can't remember sleeping much if anything that night, yet I was somehow alert in the early morning chill. However, before I can continue with the recon mission for which I was chosen to lead that morning, I need to take a break. I can only say that it was where we saw those bobbing heads of NVA. This was my first time to be a squad leader, and I have to admit up front, I really couldn't figure out the reason why, nor did I care very much about the idea. What an enormous responsibility to think that you had to now be in charge! Wow…was that scary!!!
To be continued…